When I use to drink alcohol, I had alcohol.
It offered me great relaxation, ability to numb out, and an “outlet” that I was able to take advantage of when shit got crazy. I admit sometimes I still miss having The option to drink and tap out. Being sober is anything but Numb. You feel everything. And as an ultra sensitive woman, quite intuitive, I am much more vibrantly alive than ever before. For better or worse.
But the thing is, when I relied upon alcohol it was the only thing I relied on for relief. For better or worse. And trust me it was worse. Thankfully I didn’t have any tragedy that precluded my decision to abstain from all alcohol. And that first year was tough. I only had this day, and then the next day. Some days it was hour to hour, minute to minute, moment to moment. Thank Goddess, it DID get easier. Just like they said it would.
I always knew that in order to find sobriety, my emotional tool kit required a hefty overhaul. I needed to strengthen my available coping mechanisms. While connecting with others was instrumental, whether online or live, this was quite challenging for me. Ironically, I can experience some significant social anxiety, and connecting without the crutch of alcohol could be quite the challenge.
In my sobriety, I have found a great many magical touches that enlighten, Inform, entertain, and deliciously heighten my senses beyond what I was able to achieve when I was abusing alcohol. When I offer my clients five sense therapies, it is truly therapies for all five senses, and then some. While indulging the five senses we cultivate our sixth sense, our intuition and deep connection to the divine. What a treat!
In fact, all the five sense therapies are beautiful delicacies. I enjoy Music not only for the melodies but for the vibrations, as well as the delicious landscapes in which to dance the temple that is my body. In Nature I am in treated to a feast for the eyes, the nose, the ears and the touch on my skin as I am surrounded by all of nature’s bounty and beauty. To have plants and flowers in my home is an exceptional indulgence, and to enjoy selecting a bouquet from Trader Joe’s or Whole Foods provide exquisite aromas and visual beauty for not only myself but my entire family, while cultivating appreciation for all that can be found in nature.
I love aromas, whether it is a delicious herbal tea, fresh ground ginger, astringent tumeric, or defusing or massage with essential oils. The bounties I have been able to enjoy from essential oil’s is immeasurable. They provide so many vibrations to indulge in, whether I need deep grounding, inspiring vitality, clarity and concentration, or the keys to the gateway to greater connection to the Divine. To work with the essences of flowers and essential oils remind me of the connectivity of all of nature, our unified field of consciousness that includes all of us, you, me – ourselves.
To think that I allowed alcohol to rob me of the gifts of these levels of awareness boggles my mind. There is a Sanskrit word, Prajnaparadha –literally, “an offense against wisdom” – which happens whenever one part of you insists on an action that is detrimental to the rest of you. It happens when you know deep inside that something is not right for your body-mind-spirit, but you obstinately go ahead and do it anyway, ignoring Nature’s warnings. The path of the sober one is indeed the Warriors Path, forcing us to work in concert with the wisdom of nature. My path is the path of the warrior Goddess. For me my battle was to wage in concert with the five senses, not to paralyze them. My path winds and turns, for better or worse, but offers me sensation and experience that I wouldn’t trade for the world, for all of nature’s bounty is at my fingertips to experience and indulge.